7a.m. at the kitchen table.
William: Dogs haf’ tails.
Me: Yes, dogs have tails.
William: Horsies haf’ tails.
Me: Yes, horses have tails.
William: Bunnies haf’ tails.
Me: Yes, bunnies have tails - cute little fluffy ones.
William: Pipple haf’ tails - NOOOOO! (Furious shaking of head)
Me: No, people don’t have tails.
4p.m. at the boardroom table.
J: Guys, the pre-launch two-state test is about to roll out. We’re implementing the Thoresian strategy based on prior learnings going forward. We’ve got above the line, through the line and below the line and it’s been successfully focus-group tested.
K: Great. Ambient?
J: Check. Plus viral. We’re excited about viral. It’s big.
K: It’s huge.
Me (THINKING): WTF?
I don’t know why I go to work, really. I can get more sense out of a 23 month old baby than a room full of adults.