I lost two mobile phones in two weeks.
I left the first one in the car overnight. The car was parked on the street and it was unlocked. The phone was on the dashboard where it could be seen. The next morning it was gone. It could have been worse. I left my wallet in the side pocket of the car door and it was still there in the morning. Hell, they could have taken the whole car but nobody steals Volvo station wagons. You have to give them away.
I reported the theft at the police station, only because an item in the local paper had said police were appealing for all crimes to be reported, no matter how petty.
- Was there any damage to the car when they broke in?
- There was no damage, officer. I left the car unlocked.
He looked at me.
- You left the car unlocked. With your phone on the dashboard. In view. Overnight.
He had a sad kind of half smile and his eyes seemed to glaze over as he filled out the incident report in duplicate, as if he didn't want to be a policeman any more. I didn't tell him I also usually leave the keys in the ignition because I was afraid he might break down in tears and that would just smudge the sheet.
The second phone I left in a soup noodle cafe in High Street. (The soup was great - a giant bowl of noodles and fish and bean shoots and chili and chinese basil and more noodles and more bean shoots and more chili, all swimming around in what couldn't have been more than a couple of gallons of delicious soup. The tea is free and you walk out so full of fluid you can hear yourself sloshing down the street. Having left your phone on the table, if you're me.)
That was the phones. Now I've got another new one and I haven't lost it yet. Then, early last week, I withdrew $450 in cash from a teller machine to pay for the new back fence, walked away with my card and the receipt, drove halfway home, remembered I hadn't removed the cash, did a highly dangerous sudden U-turn, sped back to the teller machine, walked into the bank and there was a man handing the cash over the counter. I nearly kissed him.
I left the first one in the car overnight. The car was parked on the street and it was unlocked. The phone was on the dashboard where it could be seen. The next morning it was gone. It could have been worse. I left my wallet in the side pocket of the car door and it was still there in the morning. Hell, they could have taken the whole car but nobody steals Volvo station wagons. You have to give them away.
I reported the theft at the police station, only because an item in the local paper had said police were appealing for all crimes to be reported, no matter how petty.
- Was there any damage to the car when they broke in?
- There was no damage, officer. I left the car unlocked.
He looked at me.
- You left the car unlocked. With your phone on the dashboard. In view. Overnight.
He had a sad kind of half smile and his eyes seemed to glaze over as he filled out the incident report in duplicate, as if he didn't want to be a policeman any more. I didn't tell him I also usually leave the keys in the ignition because I was afraid he might break down in tears and that would just smudge the sheet.
The second phone I left in a soup noodle cafe in High Street. (The soup was great - a giant bowl of noodles and fish and bean shoots and chili and chinese basil and more noodles and more bean shoots and more chili, all swimming around in what couldn't have been more than a couple of gallons of delicious soup. The tea is free and you walk out so full of fluid you can hear yourself sloshing down the street. Having left your phone on the table, if you're me.)
That was the phones. Now I've got another new one and I haven't lost it yet. Then, early last week, I withdrew $450 in cash from a teller machine to pay for the new back fence, walked away with my card and the receipt, drove halfway home, remembered I hadn't removed the cash, did a highly dangerous sudden U-turn, sped back to the teller machine, walked into the bank and there was a man handing the cash over the counter. I nearly kissed him.
I'm going to worry now any time you are taking that baby out with you....
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